Stop saying, “Good job!” Say this instead.

I make this mistake with my kids all the time—do you?

Many well-intentioned parents think that if we can just be encouraging enough, our kids will be more confident.

We say “Good job!” or “I love it!” when reacting to our kids’ artwork.

We tell them they have real talent, they should keep drawing, etc.

It’s natural—it comes from a place of love and encouragement.

But it could actually be hurting our kids.

Research shows that vague, reactionary praise could actually stifle our kids’ growth.

In fact, one study found that children who were praised for being “good” at something became more afraid of failure and less likely to take creative risks.

But kids who were praised for their effort—how they solved a problem or persisted through a challenge—were more likely to embrace difficulties and keep improving. (1999, Kamins & Dweck)

So how do we use our words to actually build lasting confidence and skills in our kids?

Here are a few tips:

1. Praise for problem-solving, not just the final product

🚫 Instead of: “You’re so creative!”

✅ Try: “I noticed you weren’t sure how to draw the hands at first, but you kept adjusting them and used that tutorial until they looked just right. That kind of problem-solving makes you a real artist.”

🔹 Why it works: This shifts the focus from natural ability to intentional effort, helping your child see themselves as someone who can figure things out.

2. Connect today’s effort to their artistic growth over time

🚫 Instead of: “I love it!”

✅ Try: “Wow, remember when you used to avoid drawing backgrounds? Now you’re filling the whole page with awesome details!”

🔹 Why it works: This type of praise orients them toward their own progress rather than some external standard like your own approval or other people’s art—a key factor in building lasting confidence.

3. Praise that encourages curiosity, not perfection

🚫 Instead of: “That cat looks perfect!”

✅ Try: “Woah, that fur texture looks so realistic—how did you do that?”

🔹 Why it works: Asking about their choices reinforces that creative thinking matters more than just getting it ‘right.’

4. Acknowledge persistence, not just ease

🚫 Instead of: “Wow, you finished so fast!”

✅ Try: “That looks like a tricky perspective to draw, but you stuck with it. I love seeing you take on new challenges.”

🔹 Why it works: Praising speed or ease can accidentally teach kids to avoid hard things—while praising persistence helps them embrace challenges.

But let’s be honest—this stuff is hard work.

I’ll admit it—I still catch myself saying “Good job!” or “I love it!” all the time with my kids.

It’s instinctive. It’s fast. And it feels good in the moment.

Switching to more intentional praise takes an extra beat of thought—but it’s worth it if it pays off in the long run.

It helps our kids see themselves as artists who grow through effort, not just talent.

And over time, that shift in mindset makes a huge difference.

Stay creative,
Daniel
Kids Cartoon Academy